How to fix high expectations?

[starsthatshine]

How does one lower their expectations of themselves?

I have unnaturally high expectations of myself and I'm beginning to think this is a serious problem...

Comments

[lizrocks.livejournal.com]

Speaking generally, I try to think of them now more as goals rather than expectations. I strive for them but if I don't live up to them there's always tomorrow.

It also helps me to break down my expectations into steps (if possible, if it's not something intangible). It makes them easier to attain and makes me feel more accomplished when I only get it half way done.

Plus, thanks to Harley, I really learned to laugh at myself and not take things so seriously. That's a work in progress (and likely always will be) but it helps me a lot.

It's a difficult thing to work on because it's so automatic and ingrained into your thoughts and daily life. You just have to remind yourself often and work on having a short term memory on mistakes.

[aliasagent.livejournal.com]

That sounds excellent but I don't know... Personally, I guess I don't really have any "goals" and sort of a lot of expectations on me. I guess my kind of problem is more along the lines of 'be great, do your best' kind of thing rather than 'I need to get an A'. People have told me to get more concrete goals and stuff but to me that just seems silly in a way. Not that it's a silly method I just... it just feels like it doesn't work for me. I've been doing this generalization of what I need to accomplish for so long that breaking it down to smaller goals and processing them one at the time sort of feels like I'm missing a bigger picture.

... Does that make sense?

[humbuggirl.livejournal.com]

If you find out feel free to let me know. I constantly disappoint myself, lol.

[aliasagent.livejournal.com]

Hehe. I'm on a constant search, but I find that such common phrases such as 'lower your expectations' and stuff like that are really hard. I mean, how do you lower your expectations? Because no one really tells you. I think it's like the same thing with headaches - how do you know when you have a headache? And how do you know it's in pain and not something else?

... sometimes I really need to stay out of my own head I think :P

[allwhowander121.livejournal.com]

by failing at life and going "huh well then"

Only it doesn't work so much.

[saranyu.livejournal.com]

I don't know actually.

The only thing is, that the one thing that is worse than not doing anything is to actually try to measure up to those high expectations and fail.

It's difficult. What expectations do you have on yourself?

[worshipthedean.livejournal.com]

I have no idea; I have the same issue. :/

I saw you on spn_woohoo. I've been looking for more friends to squee over SPN & J2 with and you're from Sweden (I used to live there!) So, I'm adding you! Add me back?

[aliasagent.livejournal.com]

Most definitely :) You're most welcome :)